Water is the new Mace

I was just (like an hour ago) walking home alone after running some errands when I noticed something amiss.  I was about to turn to cross over to my street when I saw that this kid (maybe 16 or so) motion to his friend to walk ahead.  I didn't have a good feeling about it, but at the same time didn't feel like I was in immediate danger so I kept on my way.  I had purchased a bottle of water while I was out, so I unscrewed the bottle cap figuring if the kid was going to mess with me I'd douse him.

I passed the kid up, but surely enough I knew when he was right behind me.  Then I felt his arm draped around me, whisper something in my ear, and then grab my behind.  I honestly didn't think about it when I turned around and threw the water all over him.  The kid looked surprised, a little scared, but mostly what the hell, lady? I knew better to turn around and keep walking.  I wanted to make sure I knew what he was going to do next.  He started to run off, but turned around and walked back towards me. I threw more water  and then threw the bottle at him.  My inner self did a dance of joy when the bottle hit him.  I typically have terrible aim.

All the while I was throwing water at the kid I was screaming at him.  Who knows if he knows what I was saying, but it was something like: "YOU DO NOT TOUCH ME! EVER! YOU DO NOT GRAB WOMEN! YOU ARE AN ENTITLED LITTLE SH*T.  FU*K YOU!" 

I then passed his friend to which I shouted a bit of the same and telling him his friend is an asshole.  Followed by flipping both of them off, adding several more FU*K YOU's to the mix for some added spice.  I mean, if you're going to get to tell off someone may as well make it count.  And I just love flipping the bird.  I really do.

As I walked away I remembered one of my favorite quotes in Tina Fey's Bossypants: 

“A coworker at SNL dropped an angry c-bomb on me and i had the weirdest reaction. To my surprise, I blurted, "No. You don't get to call me that. My parents love me! I'm not some Adult Child of an Alcoholic that's going to take that shit.”

Damn right, Tina.  

Then...

I did not walk away for much longer like a boss. The realization that I could of been harmed (although, honestly, it wasn't a reality), the fact that I had drawn so much attention to myself, the fact that I let my temper escalate to where I only saw black, and the fact that in that moment I felt very much alone, came over me.  Luckily my building wasn't too far away, and I was able to dissolve into crying in the comfort of my own elevator. Like that bad crying in movies where you hug the wall and fall to the floor.  Yea, it was similar to that.

Sexual harassment is a major problem in Egypt.  If one more person (cough, Egyptian men, cough) says it's not I'm going to scream.  This episode of butt grabbing is my third harassment experience in two years.  The first two were verbal, somewhat physical-ish since they got in my personal space and whispered in my ear, but nothing like earlier today.  Have I ever been subject to sexual harassment in the US?  Yes, absolutely.  Ask any woman who has worked in kitchens if they haven't.  You'll find the ones that say they haven't few and far between.  However, appropriate steps were taken to ensure that it stopped.  I felt protected by my company, by strict sexual harassment laws, my parents, and fellow coworkers.  These protections do not exist here.

Vigilante groups have taken to the streets to protect women from harassment.  Seth showed me another article, will post if I find it, with the same subject.  However, in the article he showed me,  the quotes from some Egyptians gave me the mad rage.  Basically their feelings that are if a girl is wearing makeup and jewelry she's asking to be groped.  Today my hair was pulled back, so were my bangs, zero makeup, only jewelry was my wedding ring, and let's not forget the whole 5 months pregnant thing.  I'm not pointing my sloppy dress (I'm tired! Give me a break!) to say I didn't deserve to be groped, and other girls who look better are, I just want to point out that everyone is at risk.  Expat's who dress conservatively (even though it's damn hot here), expats who dress in ways I wouldn't do even in the most liberal of countries, Egyptian women who choose to wear a hijab, Egyptian women who choose not to wear one- they all have had experience with being groped, or worse, being assaulted. 

Siiigh.  What to do?  Hell if I know.  A large part of it starts in the home.  Why these boys and men are not taught better is beyond me.  Hopefully more and more people refuse to "take that shit" (thank you Ms Fey) and a major movement begins.  Because inappropriate language or touching is wrong.  Even as I type that I feel a sense of duh come over me because it's a very simple concept.  I don't see how people don't realize this.

   

I'd love to keep this blog all fresh and daisy like, but that wouldn't do the future me or anyone else (expats who read this, future expats moving to Egypt) a service. Our lives here are very much filled with friends, great trips of a lifetime, and happiness.  Then there are the frustrations of daily life that get to you.  Sadly, one of those for me is dealing with this part Egypt.  And- Egypt, you're better than this.  Some of the kindest people in the world live here.  Manners, hospitality that puts all others to shame and humor are all found in this country.  Y'all just need to tell the majority of the men here to shape up, and then teach their sons too.

It got heavy in here.  I'll take some time to enjoy one of my favorite Snoopy scenes.  My very favorite one  is when Snoopy punches out a cat in Race for Your Life Charlie Brown.  But I can't find it on You Tube. Just know it's hilarious.   

Constant Cravings

aaahhhh haaaa 
Has always been

Whoops, pardon the kd lang lyrics.


You know what I want right now?

Zebra Cakes.  Oooohhh how I want some delicious Little Debbie Zebra Cakes.  Good thing it's not December because I'd be clawing at the walls with craving the Christmas Tree Cakes.

Oh hello, Baby.  Long time no see.

You know what sucks right now?

I can't get them.  I really can't indulge in any kind of craving.

Being pregnant while living overseas isn't so bad other than the annoyance of not being able to satisfy cravings by running to Whole Foods and make a gigantic salad filled with black olives and bleu cheese, or indulge in some tasty (cover your ears Zebra Cakes!) processed, empty calorie cake goodness or an Italian BMT from Subway.  Mmmmhhh delicious Italian BMT on wheat, no cheese, extra olives, no tomatoes.

I have to stop with these pics.  If not then I'm on the first plane outta here.

Everything else is going great!  I have an absolutely wonderful OB, I get the latest and greatest care (same as I would in the US), and I can take out my pregnancy rage on little shit teenagers.  More on that later!

The Western Desert

We spent the Eid Al-Ahada holiday on a trip to the Western Desert.  Both Seth and I have been wanting to get here somehow since we first moved to Cairo.  It's an amazing place and was well worth the wait.

Seth's friend Monica from his bike club in Maadi was arranging the trip, and we were very happy to join up with her crew (thanks again for the gracious invite!). The crew was, like most expat groups here, a small UN.  There were delegates from Scotland, Venezuela, Peru, Mexico and Spain.  We represented Tejas with Benjamin, our little Texan.

We used Western Desert Tours for the trip.  I can't recommend them enough

We left Cairo around 7am on Thursday morning and headed west. Our first stop was the town of Bahairya where we ate a quick lunch. And thankfully were able to use legit toilets.  We stopped at a place halfway between Cairo and Bahariya, and let's just say I'm forever changed. The hole in the floor, covered in DNA samples, and looking like a crime scene are forever burned in my memory.   Even my 2 year old who will eat old cereal off the floor knew those bathrooms were "yucky, eew, gross mom."

Here's the restaurant (not gross rest stop) where we stopped.

Really cool building, was breezy and lovely inside.  Complete with rockin techno music to add an added  touch of authenticity. 

After eating we left our bus and got into our desert friendly modes of transport- one of the coolest SUV's ever, the Toyota Land Cruiser.  And not the lame suburbia type comfort ones either, these are legit off road vehicles.

"This is Ben-jinn's Jeep!"

After loading up the jeeps (I'm just going to call them jeeps from now on.  Worked for my 2 year old, works for me.) we headed down the road- last paved one we'd be on for 2 days- to a large mountain.  As we approached I thought I was seeing things when I could make out figures of people on top of it.  The thing was too high, no way anyone would want to climb it.  Then Khalid, our driver, told us we were stopping if anyone wanted to climb it.

Seth did...

Thank You Virginia for the great pic!

Benny and I* did not...

Because this is the view from the top....

just looking at this makes me out of breath.  It was a serious climb!

Senor Studly post climb

The first desert we were in, the same one with the mountain that I wasn't climbing,  is called The Black Desert.  The rocks here are former volcanic lava that flowed all over the hills.

When the hike up death mountain finished we headed off road.  First stop was what Khalid called Valley of the Watermelon Stones.  The rocks here were actual spheres.  I couldn't believe it!

These are all stacked on top of each other by random passer by's

Benjamin and his new buddy Allen had a blast picking up the stones.

After walking around while the guides let air out of the tires (more traction for getting through the sand) we began our off road journey.  Because where we're going going we don't need roads....

Luckily for Benjamin and myself- who were both about to hurl in the jeep- our first campsite was about 10 minutes away. This is where we camped the first night.  Picture taken before everyone else arrived.

The sand was cool to walk in without shoes, there was a cool breeze blowing and we were in heaven.

The contrast between the dunes and the clear blue sky is amazing.  It's one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.  The dunes are also so pristine and wind swept. You can see the lines in the sand in the picture above.

Enough with being pristine!  Let's wreck the place!

After everyone's tent was set up our guides began cooking dinner.  We relaxed, let the little guys run around, and enjoyed the clear and cool evening. (Thank you to Monica- I'm using some of your pictures)

 Dinner was excellent- chicken cooked over the camp fire, rice and vegetables.

After dinner Benjamin and mom were fading fast, so we headed back to our tent to fall right to sleep.  I went to brush my teeth, and the little guy was out.  No blanket, no need for monkey, just fast asleep.

"Guys, seriously, let me go to bed.  I don't need chicken"

Seth stayed up for awhile to enjoy the evening's entertainment.  Our guides brought drums and sang for the group.

Benjamin slept pretty well through the night.  He woke up early, but luckily we brought Seth's tablet and he watched Megamind for awhile.  We had to spend two more days with the group, and didn't want them to hate us for waking them up at 5am.  Even I kinda hated us for waking up at 5am.

Once everyone had eaten and packed up in the morning we got a start to Day 2.  It was a busy day packed with all kinds of site seeing.  Khaled told us "where we camped last night was just regular desert.  The area we are in now was once under the sea.  95 million years ago this was the ocean.  We know this because of the seashells and fossils that are found in the rocks"  So, basically, we got to walk on the bottom of the ocean.  Among fossils.  That are millions of years old.  Is this really our life?!  What a privilege to get to see such things.

Giant hole in a giant white rock.  By rock I mean chalk- the entire structure is chalk. Oh, and millions and millions of years old.

Seashells embedded in the chalk-rock.  In the middle of the desert.  

Quick group photo in the hole.

Then we're off again to visit an Oasis.  First stop was rescuing another SUV from being stuck in the sand.  It needs to be noted that we were basically on the edge of an enormous drop off.

Noted by the kung-fu grip I have on Benjamin as he tries to squirm away and explore...

So our guides help the other SUV out of a jam.  Then off the stuck SUV goes down this, and no exaggeration here, like 90 degree drop from the top.

View from the bottom

We stopped at an Oasis for awhile.  We were planning on having lunch there, but it was really crowded. Benjamin was asleep in the car, so I stayed with him.

We stopped in the shade for lunch.  Staying in the shade was a must.

Then, the reason for coming on the trip.  The White Desert.  Let me just say right now that our pictures do not depict what it's actually like there.  You can't even put it into words.  Khaled told us "Welcome to the Moon." He was correct

Like no other place in the world....

Once again, all chalk.  So we all had chalk covered butts.

Our tent

Relaxing

Campsite 

That night we enjoyed another great meal cooked by our guides.  It wasn't as cool as the night before, but still very comfortable.  Benjamin was practically begging to go to sleep. So he and I turned in for the night, Seth stayed up for awhile.

Hamduillah, my man B slept till 7 the next morning.

We went to see some interesting structures the next day.

Like the famous Mushroom and Chicken Rock (if you Google White Desert this image comes up the most)

I love the White Desert thiiiis much!

Needless to say we had an amazing trip, met new friends, and got to explore a part of the Sahara Desert. 

Thank you Black and White Desert- we had an awesome time!

Dirty, sand filled hair, tired and couldn't be happier!

*Needs to be noted that I'm 5 months pregnant.  We're very excited to add to our family!  I'm due in March..

Dear guy in the row ahead of us on the plane

I get it.  You think you're cursed for the next 45 minutes of your life because you have to sit next to a 2 year old on the plane.

I'll stop said 2 year old from kicking your chair, shaking your chair, screaming, opening and closing the tray and all things that will directly mess up you life.  I vow to make sure he doesn't do anything that's going to jiggle your seat or hurt your ears.

However, what I won't do is stop him from playing cars on his very own chair while quietly making crashing noises, or laughingly pointing out that we're on a plane a million times, or any general 2 year old activities.  These general 2 year old activities keep him from crying, lashing out at me, and all things that will most definitely lead to the kicking of your chair, etc.

And I hear your deep sighs, I see your eyes rolling while my child looks out the window and tells me over and over we're on an "Urr-plane".  I get all your passive aggressive motions that your day is just effed because you're sitting next to us for the next 45 minutes.  This actually doesn't make me want to be more vigilant. It makes me want to let my kid get all kinds of Lord of the Flies and just go nuts on you.

As of now a 45 minute flight to me is nothing when you consider our next two flights are at least 4 hours each.  One will take us over the Atlantic and the other will traverse Europe and the Mediterranean Sea.

So, doing what you did is a good move- sigh deeply, gather your magazine, go to another seat, give me a good "I hate you look" and enjoy the remaining 15 minutes of your flight.  Your day is now saved.  I'll just do what I did- see you, pretend not to, and give my 2 year old a hug.

Hurricanes in Cairo

Living here often reminds me of growing up in the Gulf South. No, you don't see guys walking around wearing Costas and Seersucker pants.  And no, you don't see kids playing wearing themed smocked outfits.

I don't know, man.  We just like to theme out our kids in embroidered stuff.  Just go with it...

Aside from the lack of some of my favorite things about the South (cause I do love me a smocked theme outfit and Seth in Seersucker) there are plenty of times where I'm reminded of growing up in Hurricane Country.  Obviously there aren't any actual hurricanes here.  Rain here lasts for maybe 10 seconds, and is easily confused with someone just watering their grass.  

So how is living in the desert in the Middle East like living in the sub-tropical Gulf South? Grab your hurricane lamps and your bags of ice, pull up a chair, and I'll tell you.

A hurricane lamp- in case you needed a reference 

Rolling Blackouts
There is no joy like the process of trying your best to get to sleep without power, in the middle of summer, while mosquitoes feast on your blood.  The air is think and you're going crazy. You really can't react the way you'd like to, which is throwing a tantrum and air punching in the darkness, because if you did you would get even more hot.

Why didn't we get the ultra powered generator? Why?!

With a hurricane the power is out for week(s), depending on how badly you were hit.  In Cairo the power can be out for hours, depending on...well, I have no idea how they regulate who gets blacked out and for how long.  In the midst of my tantrum I always picture a guy in a big control room with blinking lights.  Fully fanned and in the A/C with feet propped up and reading a magazine.  He has forgotten our section in Maadi, was supposed to have restored power hours ago, but he's reading and chewing gum.  Maybe add a head phone to the image.

Add blinking lights, maybe one of those light up maps of the world, and this is how I picture the guy.

The feeling our stagnant air makes my skin crawl.  Memories of laying in bed post hurricane, no power, come flooding back into my mind.  And here those memories are pretty much a nightly occurrence because rolling blackouts are frequent.  We have two fans pointed directly at us in our room.  Benjamin has one too. Fans are just something we gotta have.  Fans and my $100 to the shop owner on Road 9 who still has my money...and the two fans we're supposed to own.  I digress.

Election Maddness
I can't wrap my mind around the election (I'm talking Egypt here, not the US).  I fully admit to not being  as up to date as I should be in the process.  It changes constantly, and I don't know that it's my place to have an opinion about the election one way or another.  It is interesting to get perspectives from different people.  Most Coptics want Ahmed Shafik, obviously people who are in the Muslim Brotherhood want Mohamed Morsi. Overall, the masses don't want either one. Shafik comes from Mubarak's regime, and people do not trust the Muslim Brotherhood. 

First they have elections for a new Parliament. Huzzah!  Elections that count in Egypt.  Not so fast...SCAF dissolved Parliament last week.

Now we're waiting out the results of the runoff between Shafik and Morsi.  Both parties claim a victory.  I saw a funny tweet saying "Egypt hasn't had a President for 16 months and now we have 2!".  Whatever side wins can lead to another revolution.  Most feel that another large scale revolution, which is likely to turn violent, is certain if Shafik wins.  I can her my mom gasping right now (Hi, Mommy!).  We are safe.

So, how is this like a hurricane?  The wait.  The buildup.  The uncertainty.
Like when a hurricane is coming, and you sit in front of the tv for hours watching all news channels for any up to date information.  Aaaah! Maybe CNN has just received breaking news...No, change it to Fox! Maybe they know...Local news? They're local and stuff!  All the while you're watching that huge cloud thingy on the tv approaching your home.  Doom is coming!  Dooooommm!

But, maybe not.  Like the hurricane that was supposed to kill us all (Ike?), and we didn't get a drop of rain.  I was all suited up in my hurricane gear of a rain slicker and baseball cap.  I looked just like the weather men on every news station.I then ran to my parent's house (Seth and our dog Brew in tow) just like a good baby of the family should do.  After an hour I took off the rain coat.  100 degree weather and my ensemble just didn't mesh well.  After 3 hours we stopped watching the news and turned it to a movie.  After 6 hours I was over it.  When we woke up we saw that nothing had happened.  We were all safe and sound, dry as a bone.

This guy missed the memo regarding wearing a baseball cap.

So far every supposed to be big event here has been very Ike-like.  There were large protests in November that got violent, but nothing that directly affected us at all.  We all stayed glued to Al Jazeera's Egypt Blog, all the tweets from people in the protests and the news.  We didn't know if we were going to be evacuated or what.  What happened? We were not evacuated, the protests didn't head our way, and things in Maadi didn't change one bit.  It was business as usual the entire time.  Same thing with Mubarak's trial.  What would happen when the verdict was read?! And, just as an aside, could the guy reading his sentence have taken any longer?!  Like 45 minutes of talk before giving the verdict. After the verdict came I left a friend's house to bring Benjamin home for his nap.  I didn't hear any radio's playing from the trial, nobody was talking about it, it was just a normal day.  

We don't know what's going to happen after the election results are announced.  They were supposed to announce them today.  But, sigh, they're going to announce them on Saturday or Sunday.  Which, as I understand, is illegal.  We have a suitcase packed just in case we're evacuated.  All precautions have been taken.  Also, Seth's company (along with pretty much every other company/USAID/Embassy) just don't sit on their hands when bad things are going down.  If it becomes necessary for us to leave we will be out of here.  And quick-like.
So if any of this blog has made you worried for our safety (Hi Mom- buy ham before we come home) please do not be worried.  I just feel that it's necessary to document all of our experiences here, good or bad.

We're just sitting back and waiting what's next.  As CNN calls it it's a possible "developing story".