I was just (like an hour ago) walking home alone after running some errands when I noticed something amiss. I was about to turn to cross over to my street when I saw that this kid (maybe 16 or so) motion to his friend to walk ahead. I didn't have a good feeling about it, but at the same time didn't feel like I was in immediate danger so I kept on my way. I had purchased a bottle of water while I was out, so I unscrewed the bottle cap figuring if the kid was going to mess with me I'd douse him.
I passed the kid up, but surely enough I knew when he was right behind me. Then I felt his arm draped around me, whisper something in my ear, and then grab my behind. I honestly didn't think about it when I turned around and threw the water all over him. The kid looked surprised, a little scared, but mostly what the hell, lady? I knew better to turn around and keep walking. I wanted to make sure I knew what he was going to do next. He started to run off, but turned around and walked back towards me. I threw more water and then threw the bottle at him. My inner self did a dance of joy when the bottle hit him. I typically have terrible aim.
All the while I was throwing water at the kid I was screaming at him. Who knows if he knows what I was saying, but it was something like: "YOU DO NOT TOUCH ME! EVER! YOU DO NOT GRAB WOMEN! YOU ARE AN ENTITLED LITTLE SH*T. FU*K YOU!"
I then passed his friend to which I shouted a bit of the same and telling him his friend is an asshole. Followed by flipping both of them off, adding several more FU*K YOU's to the mix for some added spice. I mean, if you're going to get to tell off someone may as well make it count. And I just love flipping the bird. I really do.
As I walked away I remembered one of my favorite quotes in Tina Fey's Bossypants:
“A coworker at SNL dropped an angry c-bomb on me and i had the weirdest reaction. To my surprise, I blurted, "No. You don't get to call me that. My parents love me! I'm not some Adult Child of an Alcoholic that's going to take that shit.”
Damn right, Tina.
Then...
I did not walk away for much longer like a boss. The realization that I could of been harmed (although, honestly, it wasn't a reality), the fact that I had drawn so much attention to myself, the fact that I let my temper escalate to where I only saw black, and the fact that in that moment I felt very much alone, came over me. Luckily my building wasn't too far away, and I was able to dissolve into crying in the comfort of my own elevator. Like that bad crying in movies where you hug the wall and fall to the floor. Yea, it was similar to that.
Sexual harassment is a major problem in Egypt. If one more person (cough, Egyptian men, cough) says it's not I'm going to scream. This episode of butt grabbing is my third harassment experience in two years. The first two were verbal, somewhat physical-ish since they got in my personal space and whispered in my ear, but nothing like earlier today. Have I ever been subject to sexual harassment in the US? Yes, absolutely. Ask any woman who has worked in kitchens if they haven't. You'll find the ones that say they haven't few and far between. However, appropriate steps were taken to ensure that it stopped. I felt protected by my company, by strict sexual harassment laws, my parents, and fellow coworkers. These protections do not exist here.
Vigilante groups have taken to the streets to protect women from harassment. Seth showed me another article, will post if I find it, with the same subject. However, in the article he showed me, the quotes from some Egyptians gave me the mad rage. Basically their feelings that are if a girl is wearing makeup and jewelry she's asking to be groped. Today my hair was pulled back, so were my bangs, zero makeup, only jewelry was my wedding ring, and let's not forget the whole 5 months pregnant thing. I'm not pointing my sloppy dress (I'm tired! Give me a break!) to say I didn't deserve to be groped, and other girls who look better are, I just want to point out that everyone is at risk. Expat's who dress conservatively (even though it's damn hot here), expats who dress in ways I wouldn't do even in the most liberal of countries, Egyptian women who choose to wear a hijab, Egyptian women who choose not to wear one- they all have had experience with being groped, or worse, being assaulted.
Siiigh. What to do? Hell if I know. A large part of it starts in the home. Why these boys and men are not taught better is beyond me. Hopefully more and more people refuse to "take that shit" (thank you Ms Fey) and a major movement begins. Because inappropriate language or touching is wrong. Even as I type that I feel a sense of duh come over me because it's a very simple concept. I don't see how people don't realize this.
I'd love to keep this blog all fresh and daisy like, but that wouldn't do the future me or anyone else (expats who read this, future expats moving to Egypt) a service. Our lives here are very much filled with friends, great trips of a lifetime, and happiness. Then there are the frustrations of daily life that get to you. Sadly, one of those for me is dealing with this part Egypt. And- Egypt, you're better than this. Some of the kindest people in the world live here. Manners, hospitality that puts all others to shame and humor are all found in this country. Y'all just need to tell the majority of the men here to shape up, and then teach their sons too.
It got heavy in here. I'll take some time to enjoy one of my favorite Snoopy scenes. My very favorite one is when Snoopy punches out a cat in Race for Your Life Charlie Brown. But I can't find it on You Tube. Just know it's hilarious.
